is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize