she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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