Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
