at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
