Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
