quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Randomize
