1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
