Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
