Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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