ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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