Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
