a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize