Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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