We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
