i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
nutella sex= disaster
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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