Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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