I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I just want to make out with him forever
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Randomize
