If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
she smelled like a LAN party
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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