I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
