DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
