Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
PANTIES FOUND
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