I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
