And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
