Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
