Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
