is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
The beer is more important than you right now.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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