I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
40s are totally the cure
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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