just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Alive.
So much puke
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
