You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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