seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
