I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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