i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Randomize
