I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
