I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
