You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
