Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
