i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
