Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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