1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Barsexuality is the new black.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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