There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize