You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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