hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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