You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
