am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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