girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
