Kiss
Puke
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
