two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Randomize
