Where did you get a picture of my penis
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
