love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
