College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
